Raised by heathens in suburban America,
we ate fried lobsters with beer,
and watched beasts of men
chase after stuffed pig skin.
We listened to symphonies,
read Dostoyevsky,
debated Nietzche,
and concluded that God was a feel-good drug.
Then one week after next,
we were invited to a rabbi's home
for Shabbos underneath two candles.
Slowly, we returned to our civilized roots,
found our tradition, rediscovered
the wisdom of our ancestors.
Men raised in the wild,
gave up fried lobsters for kugel,
Nietzche for Letters of the Rebbe,
and exchanged Nirvana
for the Miami Boys Choir.
Raised by heathens in suburban America,
we left behind
our aging heathen parents,
and followed in the one true way.
(The kiruv rabbi forgot to admit
that it was just a legal fiction.
D'oh)
Full Version: Raised By Heathens
QUOTE(Moshi @ Sep 18 2006, 10:36 PM) [snapback]653933[/snapback]
Slowly, we returned to our civilized roots,
Hmm... Symphonies are heathenish?
nice, but did you really have to give up beer? 
QUOTE(accolade @ Sep 19 2006, 01:05 AM) [snapback]654018[/snapback]
Hmm... Symphonies are heathenish?
Are they not written by heathens?
QUOTE(Moshi @ Sep 19 2006, 01:23 AM) [snapback]654029[/snapback]
Are they not written by heathens?
Oh, you mean like Lohengrin. Well, of course, those should be burned.
Yeah right, who am I kidding.
QUOTE(lavi chegal @ Sep 19 2006, 01:13 AM) [snapback]654023[/snapback]
nice, but did you really have to give up beer?
It's not about me.
It's about being raised by heathens.
QUOTE(accolade @ Sep 19 2006, 01:24 AM) [snapback]654031[/snapback]
Oh, you mean like Lohengrin. Well, of course, those should be burned.
Yeah right, who am I kidding.
Mmmm Herr Wagner. How appropriate.
QUOTE
and watched beasts of men
hahahahahahaha!!! I thought it said, "breasts of men"
QUOTE
It's not about me.
Then are you certain THEY wanted to give up beer?
I'm jes a heath'n from Evilville Mobile Home Park, I know. I do like the way your mind works. I'm just kinda too tired to think right now; but wanted to say something, at least.
Apparently the heathens were also raised by heathens, so it is not their fault that they are heathens.
QUOTE(Moshi @ Sep 18 2006, 09:36 PM) 
We listened to symphonies,
...and exchanged ... [them]
for the Miami Boys Choir.
...and exchanged ... [them]
for the Miami Boys Choir.
...stray cats singing in harmony...
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