If you're watching someone else primping themselves to go out, and they think they look good, but you know that they are completely out of style, would you say something? Would you want to be told to go change and put yourself together differently (assuming you have other choices in your closet)?

If they look good, and it's within socially acceptable boundaries, I'd not tell them, and assume they know what they're doing.

i would definitely tell if the outfit is to clashy, at least give my honest opinion. I like to hear honest critique too.

What are you, the fashion police?

My answer is keep it to yourself, unless you're asked.

They look good for ten years ago.


No, it's just that if someone is standing in front of the mirror, and is obviously making an effort to look good, but is missing the mark, maybe they'd appreciate being told that they're not being successful.

More than half the clothes in my closet are over 10 years old, and some are closer to 15 years old. If it still fits and is in reasonably good condition, I keep it. That's my rule of thumb. I never cared much what other people think about my clothes and I still don't.

It's all about attitude...if they think they look good, they'll feel good. So let them. Who cares if they're not "in style"...is it something that will affect them (ie interview or date)? If not, let them do their own thing.

Besides, who says that you're right?

one of my coats is 10 years old and i absolutely love it and think i look good in it (even though nowadays frum preteen-early teen girls wear it for shabbos)

what do you mean the outfit would have looked good 10 years ago? i'm trying to think of an example, but can't (i also have a lot of "old" clothing that i still wear, and i totally don't think it's out of style. but most, if not all, of my clothing is pretty conservative - it's hard to be out of style)

What kind of coat would a pre-teen wear that an adult wouldn't? (Trying to picture it, but can't...)

I think that if that's the way they dress, let them be. You don't want the prospective date to get the wrong picture, do you?

Whoa...my clothing never lasts more than a year, maybe two (denim skirts a bit longer). How the heck does clothing last you 15 years in good condition?!

I met a girl once on a shidduch who had no idea how to use make up and I felt bad for her. She was reasonably good looking, was tall, had a good figure but a pale complexion which wouldn't have mattered had she used a gloss for her lips; but instead she used bright red lip-stick and the effect was rather garish. We had a good rapport and our discussions were rather open and relaxed but after one date I didn't feel it was at all right to get that personal as to be able to give her feed-back with regards to clothes or make-up. But I wish I could have helped her.

it's not that. it's that i personally think that coat is adult-y style, or at least 16+ y. old style, not 10, 11, 12 y. old's. it was weird ot see 10-12 y. old girls wearing it on shabbos, while me and my same age friend were also wearing it (while being in our early 20s)

i remember when i bought becuase it was NYC's first trial of "no tax on clothing under $110" week

it's black, very long, fitted and then "flary", with a single row of (once) goldish buttons in front. i still absolutely love it (changed the lining once already, cause it was so torn)

Okay. I hear you. But if I feel good, but don't look good, and realize later that I didn't, I feel stupid for feeling good about looking good when in reality I didn't.

And you're right, I could be wrong


I'm sorry, I have no concept of time. How about 15-20 years old?


I wasn't talking about a dating situation, but even so, I'm not so sure I agree. I don't think the girl should pretend to be someone she isn't, but sometimes a little bit of makeup or a little bit of an updated wardrobe can make a difference between being married and single. It's so much easier to change something external rather than internal, so why not give it a try?

I have a few sweaters that are really old. I guess they were a good make; they've just held up very well over the years. I'm always gradually phasing out clothing, so each year I'll buy a few new things and retire some old things, but generally I hold on to clothing for a long time.

i don't have clothing that old in my wardrobe (cause i don't have anything from the old country), so ask me in at least 5 years but i do hope my coat will last me some more.

unless the clothing is extremely stylish (and i'm having trouble picturing a skirt or a sweater that is; with shoes it's much easier), it should be good. i think. but once again, i'm pretty conservative in my wardrobe. now, maybe some detials, like navy tights or shoes - they could be out of style now, but it's only frum style we are talking here

No no, I don't mean something like that. Navy tights and shoes would be totally okay. I mean like heavily beaded sweaters that were popular in the late '80s, or white tights.

aaah, i see. i think i would mention something about the white tights (not the sweater though) - it's so childish nowadays (have no idea what was in style in the 80s). but only if it was someone i was close enough with, and preferrably at some random time, not right before going out (but hey, if you are there while they are getting dressed before going out, maybe you could mention it)

If colors clash, by all means say something. But if you don't like the style, butt out. Some people don't care about keeping up with what the fashion industry says they're supposed to wear. I know I don't. I fit in because all my clothes are less than five years old by necessity.