Do you consider yourself to be to the Left or to the Right of your spouse or are you both on exactly the same page?
Is being on exactly the same page a prerequisite for a happy ,marriage?

I think pretty much exactly on the same page. It's kind of cool.



Absolutely not. There is much more to marriage than being on the same page in terms of ritual observance.

My hub was so far to the left of me, I'm not even sure it was the same book. I don't think you need to agree on everything, but it's far, far easier when you both have a similar starting point and just disagree on certain issues within a broader spectrum of similar religious observances. Once kids are in the picture, any conflicts become amplified as couples try to figure out which way to raise them. Happy cohabitation comes from a couple's willingness to work with one another and compromise on certain issues, whether that's aspects of yiddishkeit or folding the towels in the kitchen drawer.

I think it is imperative that both partners be close in religious observance and outlook. Otherwise it can be a problem when it comes time to raise your children in addition to the obvious practical problems of living with someone so different.

It can be done, but I think it is far from ideal.

I seem to be more to the right of my husband in most aspects, but not so significantly. However, we have both moved to the right together since we've been married.

i am definitely more to the left of him. But i know that when we got married and besides for 1 or 2 things which i am slowly getting used to i am ok with it.

Some of my friends would say it is definitely a prerequisite for a happy marriage but i dont think so. My parents for example have lived together for over 45 years and one is definitely more frummer in some things than another. So they work it out. Its prob why the girls and the boys turned out diffrent.

I think couples can make it work just like with any other differences. Same page is not a prerequisite but the same chapter might be.

I'm probably more to the Right but not so much. Same page, different paragraph?

I'm probably to the left of DH but not so much hashkafah-wise as practice wise.

Main area of discord is TV. I want it, he doesn't. We have one. He puts up with it. He's accepting and tolerant of my failings which is one of the many reasons why I love him so much. I have moved to the right on many issues on my own without pressure from him.

I think so.

Ever read "The River, the kettle and the bird"?

Did you? Why?

Yes. Because it was in the house.

So now you're going to be a really good husband, right?

He says in the beginning that the general principles will be beneficial for wives, too.

i agree.

TT -- If your cohabitating partner is a woman, her place within Judaism is to be a wife and mother. Exclusively. With the possible exception of tehillim-zugger.

Sorry. Couldn't help it.

Torah Truers?

Hell, no.

Topic title.

Thanks.

Relevance to Gehennom?

So women do have a place in Judaism?!? I can't wait to tell my wife!!!!!!

In some areas he's more right and I'm more left and in other areas it's the other way around. I think it's totally understanable considering we both became who we are without each other (does that make sense?). On a whole though, I'd say I'm more to the right than him, but he's moved alot towards the right since we met, and I've moved a bit to the left, and we meet somewhere in between (or not).

RE women's place in Judaism: I was just looking at an illustrated book in Hebrew about the Bais Hamikdash yesterday, and there was a whole section on "HaIsha b'Mikdash", all the things women did in the BHMK. Anyone know this book?

Yes, a long time ago. Or I tried to read it. I'm not sure if I ever actually got through it. Why?


That's actually more relevant to the thread about bare feet and the question in that thread if women ever did any of the avodot. The answer to both is, "yes", although there's an Igerot Moshe that disputes whether women actually shechted their korban pesach when no men were part of their chaburah, contrary to Rishonim. Whether the Igerot Moshe is being religiously polemic or historically accurate is an open question.
If you're refering to the book I think you're refering to, it's available in English RE women's place in Judaism:http://www.amazon.com/Cartas-Illustrated-Encyclopedia-Holy-Temple/dp/9652205303
and yes, it has a section, Women in the Temple.

Thank you. That's the book.