You have a wonderful family pet - a 60 lb., mostly black, mutt of questionable heritage. He has his problems, but he also has his charms. He has aged gracefully through the years and remains active, spry, and cute into his middle age.

One day a neighbor gets a new dog. A puppy. A cute, white, 8-week old, playful puppy. At their encouragement, you and your wife go to the neighbors to say hello and meet their new family member. They love dogs and your presence only fuels their excitement. The dog is admittedly cute and your wife is overcome by his exuberance and friendly nature. The neighbors are quick to pick up on this and mention that you are welcome to come by any time and play with the dog.

Over the next few days your wife takes them up on this offer and makes a number of trips over to play with the dog. You chalk it up to initial excitement and indulge her in this, even though you can both see that her presence with the other dog upsets yours (as dogs have intuitive natures and a recognition of, if not a grasp on, emotions that humans can often not detect). Despite this, as the days progress, your wife makes increasingly more trips to the neighbors and continues to invest more time playing with their dog - to the exclusion of time spent with your own dog. The effect on your dog is obvious. He is upset, anxious, and the quality of his behavior is deteriorating - his need for attention compels him to seek even negative attention. You also are upset by your wife's attention to this other dog. Household chores are not being completed and you feel ignored. Her inattention to your family pet, a dog which you brought into the marriage is a seeming indictment of her feelings towrd it and you.

What do you do?

It's obvious that you should get rid of your dog and buy a cute little fluff-puppy so your wife will be happy.
The black mutt is probably a jerk and doesn't deserve to live with someone as special as your wife.

how lucky are you that you have a rabbinical advice hotline to call at your convenience.

By any chance is the new "dog" bigger and longer than your "dog"? You may have a problem indeed.

I agree with Broadwayfreak, it's time to have the old dog put down.

I'm the only one who thinks you should write a letter to the Jewish Press?

(I like this thread.)

Thank you.

I think rabbinical intervention is the way to go, and here's why. The wife clearly has a problem which she does not recognize. Writing a letter to the Jewish Press might result in advice but if the wife doesn't think there is a problem she won't listen to it. Besides, they will probably recommend going to therapy or asking a rabbi anyway. Might as well skip that step.

Therapy will only work if the wife is willing to go, and if she doesn't think there is a problem then she won't go. Or, she will go but not be receptive to the therapist's advice.

However, if you have a rabbi who she knows give her personal advice she might be willing to listen. If she respects his opinion, then he is not "some outsider" like a therapist might be viewed. And, he is not an anonymous advice column which can easily be ignored.

why isn't putting the dog down a poll option?

Because unprovoked aggression toward animals is a symptom of psychopathy.

I don't think any animal professional would consider putting a dog down unprovoked agression. It happens all the time.

I hear you. I think speaking with a rabbi is laudable and definitely the right way to go. I voted for the Jewish Press option because I think it's very important to bring this type of issue into the public arena. Until I read this topic, I never considered that this kind of thing could be such an issue and I'm sure that most other people felt the same way. I don't think you should write to an advice column because, like you said, advice from strangers is rarely helpful. But perhaps a carefully worded letter to the editor would go a long way toward solving the greater communal problem which this will surely become.

Just sic the dog on the puppy and then act all "shaken up" about it, problem solved......

My bets are on the puppy.

Well even in that case if the wife cares about the dog, it might "shock" her back into reality...

And if not, you can complain to the authorities about the viscous puppy that savagely murdered your beloved pet and THEY will do the dirty work (and you now have a perfect excuse to get a puppy of your own)....